Canceled Again!

What do you get when you spend over five cumulative hours on hold waiting to talk to a real live person, when you get only four hours of sleep over the last 50 hours, when you stand in a super long line that stretches from one side of the airport to the other for over four hours, and when you have a total of not one, but four, yes FOUR different flights canceled?

Apparently you get booted from the country! At least, that's what I hope happens anyway.

So yesterday, I thought I had the whole airline thing figured out. I was going to fly to Los Angeles via New Orleans late Monday afternoon, arriving in LA that evening. I was told that this was the earliest flight available, and there was no way to get from Washington DC to LA any faster.

I was fine with that. The airport had suspended all flights for both Saturday and most of the day on Sunday anyway, due to this crazy monster of a snowstorm. Well, just before I was about to go to bed last night, I decided to check the Washington/Dulles International Airport's website. I'd been checking it all day to see the latest travel advisory.

This time, as I looked at the bright red letters scrolling across the screen, it read, "Wash/Dulles will be open for travel at 6:00 am Sunday Morning", or something like that.

Hmmm. 6 am, huh? I breezed on over to the United Airlines website, just curious to see what the various flight options looked like. As I scrolled through the list of comings and goings, there it was. One flight, with only two seats left, travelling from Wash/Dulled to Los Angeles via Phoenix. This flight was scheduled to depart at 8:30 am and arrive in LA sometime in the afternoon.

Awesome!

It almost looked too good to be true!

I quickly called the United hotline. Again, I endured the two hour hold 'till it came my turn to speak to a real live human being! Only this time there was a bonus thirty minute hold tacked on to the end of the two hours. Yipee!

When I finally spoke to the friendly Indian on the other end of the line, he informed me tha there were no available flights leaving on Sunday. I kindly directed him to the flight number I was looking at, to which he replied, "Oh. You know what, you're right!" Thank you very much. United should hire me for being able to find my own available flights!

The nice real live human quickly accommodated my request and punched my ticket to Phoenix/LA. Those two warm and sunny cities were sounding very appealing right about now!

As this flight was supposed to leave at 8:30, and it was now already 2:30 am (due to the 2.5 hour hold the phone), that left me with only 6 hours to get packed, brave the snow covered roads, and get to the airport. Being as it was a big weekend for Holiday travel, and seeing as how there would probably be lots and lots of other people there, trying to make their flights as well, I decided it would be a good idea to arrive early.

I left my apartment at 4:30. This gave me only two hours to pack up! Now, I could have taken a short little nap in between here somewhere, but as I had only had four hours of sleep the night before, I knew that if I fell asleep now, there was no way I'd be getting up in time to make it to the airport! So, I just stayed awake.

When 4:30 came, I headed out the door. I arrived at the airport economy parking lot at about 5:00 am. The shuttle came and picked me up and I made it to the ticketing area at approximately 5:45 am. What greeted me there was a nice, straight, long line, stretching all the way from the United counter at one end of the terminal to the other.

I got in line as quickly as I could, not wanting to risk the possibility of letting three or four other people beat me to it! The line moved pretty slow. Ok, really slow. But it was fairly consistent. I'd move up in line about one step per minute. Ok, I thought, this isn't going to be too bad. I'll still have plenty of time to make my flight.

I kept United's number in my phone. That way I could call and check on the status of my flight as I waited in line. The first call reported that it had been delayed an hour and a half. That's fine, I thought. That would give me a little more time to check in, get through security, and catch the plane in time. The line kept moving fairly steadily. After about three hours, I had finally made it to almost the front of the line. This is the exact point in time that Hell froze over. Nearly all of the morning flights, had just been canceled, including mine!

Now, this also meant that the 300 or so people still in front of me in line had just had their flights canceled as well. This meant that now, when they got to the counter, they were not just trying to check their luggage, but also determine the best alternative option for their travel plans. This meant that what was taking about five minutes to do, was now taking ten to 20. This meant that the line, the very same line that had been steadily progressing, instantly came to a dead halt.

After about thirty minutes of not moving even one little step, I remembered that I had United's number in my phone! I also remembered that I had called (many times) before and rearranged my travel plans over the phone! I quickly pulled my phone out of my pocket, dialed the number, and again, proceeded to wait while I listened to United's increasingly annoying hold music.

I figured that now I was waiting in two lines, giving me an advantage over the other travelers ahead of me! After about 15 minutes, I began to hear announcements that there were no available flights out of Wash/Dulles for the next two days. Everyone was encouraged to simply take standby tickets. No thank you United Airlines! I'll take the next flight outta here!

After about an hour, I had only moved a distance of about ten feet in the line. My ear remained glued to my phone, aching for the music to stop and a real live human to say, "Thank you for calling United, how may I help you?"

It was just about then, that this very thing happened. Only this time, it wasn't a man speaking broken English with a thick Indian accent, but rather a very nice woman speaking with an American accent!

She immediately noticed that I had been bumped from flight after flight, and I think she took some pity on me. I told her that I just wanted the very next flight to Los Angeles. She kindly informed me that those were hard to come by at the moment, bet she asked for a few minutes to search for something and put me on hold. Ten minutes later her voice came back, and she sounded extremely excited to tell me what she had discovered.

She set me up by telling me that there were no more flights connecting to LA through Phoenix, Las Vegas, or any other American cities. There were also no direct flights either. But what she did find was a flight leaving tomorrow (remember, all flights out had been booked or canceled for the next two days) connecting in Toronto, Canada, and then transferring to Air Canada for the flight to Los Angeles!

"What's that? Doth mine ears deceive me? Did you say this flight is for tomorrow?"

"Yes", she said, "tomorrow!"

I quickly said, "Book it! I'll take it!"

She then said that this is the absolute soonest I can get to Los Angeles. Non of the other operators would put me on it because it connects with a non-United airline for the Toronto to LA leg of the trip. But, like I said before, I think she took a little pity on me. Or maybe she just liked my manly voice.

After I hung up the phone (is it possible to "hang up" a cell phone?) I quickly picked up my bags off the floor and worked my way back through the line to the bewildering stares of my fellow travellers. It seemed as if they were saying, "This guy is crazy! He waits in line for over four hours, only to walk away?"

If they only knew! I suppose I could have told them all to call United. I could have told them that I just did and that I had been reconnected to a flight and no longer needed to stay in line, but something about feeling like I beat the system and left them all standing there to miserably wait out their turn, made me smile.

Now I am back at home, waiting 'till tomorrow so I can finally leave this snow covered East Coast. I have now been awake for over 51 hours with only four hours of sleep, so I'm going to bed!

And hopefully by this time tomorrow, I'll be getting booted out of this country!